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thanks for having me

by thanks for coming

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1.
"anything" 02:35
you say you say you say anything to get me back to get me back on your team but i don’t trust my legs anymore they’re running past me faster than before and i don’t trust my lungs like i should they keep coughing up things i said i would do you say you say you say anything to get me back to get me back on your team but i don’t trust your lies like i used to when i thought that good people told the truth and i don’t trust your silver screen like i did when you said it was all beautiful, but it was all painted on you say you say you say you say anything to get me back to get me back on your team you say you say you say you say anything to get me back to get me back on your team
2.
and i hear my voice crack under the weight of your expectations you want me to be a star but i’m barely a person i can feel their finger tips holding back my tongue saying, “please don’t embarrass us” and i’m not my flower dresses in springtime and i’m not my flower dresses in springtime and i’m not my flower dresses in springtime and i’m not my flower dresses in springtime and i’m not my flower dresses in springtime they’re just something for me to hide bones behind
3.
human being 02:44
your heart’s made out of metal it’s pumping out pure lead and it’s trying to pretend that it’s made out of flesh your fingers fall apart because they’re made of stone and you called me to ask if this is what it’s like letting go and you trace my body shape and say how nice it would be to be human and i am asleep in my dreams thinking how nice it would be to be anything else my head is in my hands i try to make sense of it all and you say this is beautiful as you look at the dead end of the hall we are sitting in the corner listening to the pitches of their voices and your ears start growing flowers and you tear them apart to hear the noises and you trace my body shape and say how nice it would be to be human and i am asleep in my dreams thinking how nice it would be to be anything else and you trace my body shape and say how nice it would be to be human and i yell at you in my sleep screaming how nice it would be to stop being and you trace my body shape and say how nice it would be to be human and i wake up in my sheets just another morning as a human being and you trace my body shape and say how nice it would be to be human and i take the train thinking how nice it would be to be anything else
4.
i’ve got my hand inside my skeleton trying to make myself into a puppet so someone else can live my life and i can rot away from the inside i’ve got my hand inside your sleeve i promised you that i wouldn’t bleed i told my mom that i wouldn’t jump i told my dad that i’m not a fuck up i’ve got my hand inside my skin how long has it really been? are my bones tired or is that just me? i tried to push you away so i could leave i’ve got my hand inside my skeleton trying to make myself into a puppet so someone else can live my life and i can rot away from the inside
5.
smoking until the insides of my lungs look just like yours at least i’m not pretending i’m not dying like you are drinking until the insides of my liver looks just like yours you’re saying to stop doing what i’m doing but you still are i have a cough i really don’t want and a reason to drink nyquil from the bottle my throat hurts and i’m feeling really tired but sometimes i don’t hate myself still smoking until the insides of my lungs look just like yours and i’m not sure which one of us is really sick me or you, the hypocrite

about

rachel brown - guitar/vocals
lindsey sherman - bass
nate amos - drums

songs written by rachel brown, february 9, 2015 - january 6, 2016

credits

released May 29, 2017

recorded/mixed/mastered by nate amos
@ grandpa bay in chicago, il on may 23, 2017

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all rights reserved

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Grandpa Bay Recordings Chicago, Illinois

grandpa bay archive - december 2013 through may 2017 - chicago, il

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